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I'm sucha dumbass.
I don't know if you still love me, but I still do.I know you gave me alot of chances & each time I just give you up.
It's like, I'm in a race.
I fall again & again until I don't want to carry on anymore.
Then, I saw you running ahead of me.
I knew that if I don't want to stand up, I can never complete this race.
So I caught up to you.
& asked, "Do you want to complete the race together?"
Remember what Mr Yeo said on friday?
That love is never just a bed of roses.
There is bound to be obstacles & problems along the way.
But everytime a problem occur, I just avoid & give up.
But people change.
Time change people.
Slowly, my feelings for you were solid & stable.
I know what I want, & who I want to be with.
I'm sorry for the past few months you suffered when you were with me.
I was dumb enough to actually thought you were not the one.
Like I said,
you gave me alot of chances.
But if once isn't enough, try again.
There'll definetly be a solution, as long as we stick as one.
Hand in hand.
Those were the freaking words I wanted to tell you face to face today @ 10.20!
Fuck myself man.
I actually counted-down the no. of hours left for you to stand right in front of me, while words fly.
The whole Friday night, Saturday, & Sunday.
I was preparing myself.
& I thought this was my last chance to make everything right.
I guess I was freaking wrong.
I never did had the last chance.
Because you're just not here anymore ..
I'm not sure how you can move on so fast.
Maybe the reason is, me.
I wasn't good enough.
But like you said,
"I'd rather have bad times with you than good times with someone else."
So why did you go? ..
& if your answer was, no,
I had intended to say, "It's okay. I'll wait."
“I used to think I was the strangest person in the world but then I thought there are so many people in the world, there must be someone just like me who feels bizarre and flawed in the same ways I do. I would imagine her, and imagine that she must be out there thinking of me too. Well, I hope that if you are out there and read this and know that, yes, it's true I'm here, and I'm just as strange as you.”
“This is how you do it: you sit down at the keyboard and you put one word after another until it's done. It's that easy, and that hard.”